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A few days ago, Mark Morford opined about the appalling effects of media on America’s youth and predicted general doom:

…My friend cites the fact that, of the 6,000 high school students he estimates he’s taught over the span of his career, only a small fraction now make it to his grade with a functioning understanding of written English. They do not know how to form a sentence. They cannot write an intelligible paragraph. Recently, after giving an assignment that required drawing lines, he realized that not a single student actually knew how to use a ruler.

It is, in short, nothing less than a tidal wave of dumb, with once-passionate, increasingly exasperated teachers like my friend nearly powerless to stop it. …

Interesting, infuriating, and (undoubtedly) intentionally scary essay. He does offer a small ray of hope.

With that in mind, I figure that in the future, T.S. Eliot’s The Wasteland will read like this. Unfortunately, as with most parodies, I suspect only those who appreciate the original will get the most humor out of it—which may further reinforce Morford’s point.

As long as we’re parodying poetry, consider Meowl! (Unspecified prize to whomever identifies the connection between the two poetic parodies.)

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